Operation Care International

A little over a year ago, I was sitting through yet another professional development seminar when unexpectedly a slide with contact information for Susie Jennings, the founder of Operation Care International, appeared on the screen. The presenter profusely apologized, explaining that this was a slide from a presentation he had done recently at his church, and he was uncertain how it had ended up in his slide show. The Holy Spirit spoke to my heart, “Write that down.” Fortunately I was listening and wrote down Susie’s information. When I checked out Operation Care’s website, I saw an opportunity to minister at The Bridge, a homeless shelter, around Thanksgiving of 2010. While my friends and I enjoyed this opportunity, I had my energies focused elsewhere and moved on with other areas of life and ministry.

With Operation Care a distant memory, I was preparing a worship set for our church service on October 30. As usual, I asked my husband on what topic he would be preaching. He said that actually he wasn’t speaking, but that Susie Jennings would be joining us. I was excited about this, believing that many of our people would be blessed by her testimony and might be able to help with the Christmas event. However, I did not plan to be deeply involved due to a myriad of commitments in my life at this time.

Sometimes God’s plans are not our plans. During the invitation, I prayed a dangerous prayer, “God you know my heart to be more deeply involved in worship ministry, and to be a part of what you are doing with worship around the world, but I do not have any open doors to explore this calling. So whatever you have in store for me next, in advance my answer is yes. I want to serve you in any way that you can use me for your kingdom and your glory.” This was about 12:25. At 12:45, out of the blue, Susie asked me to be a part of planning for the Operation Care Christmas event. So I said yes, and the adventure has begun.

I am excited to see where the journey leads. I still do not know what God has in store for my life, and how he plans to fulfill my calling into worship ministry, or even if this adventure is a part of that, but none of these things are even really very important. After all, it’s not about me! What is important is being used today, right here and now, for God’s kingdom. What is important is making a difference in the lives of the people that I am with each day. This may be in my classroom as a teacher, in our church as a pastor’s wife, in my home as a wife and mother, or in the weeks to come as I minister to the homeless with Operation Care. The important thing is to point to Jesus with every breath, because He alone is worthy.

Ordinary is Okay

As a child in America, we repeatedly hear that we are capable of big things. "You can be the President or an astronaut!" Then as adults, most of us end up living very ordinary lives, working very ordinary jobs. We struggle with a feeling of discontent, because somehow we didn't measure up to the dreams we had for our lives. We keep waiting for the tides to turn and our lives to become extraordinary and for our dreams to come true. We wait for our marriage to magically be like the ones we see on TV, and for our kids to be perfect. We wonder why our house isn't big enough, and our cars rattle and have peeling paint.

Don't get me wrong here, I am not saying that it is wrong to dream. I am simply saying that I have recently been considering that perhaps we have mistaken what is really extraordinary. Somehow we have this idea that it involves the right job and the right house and the right stuff. Maybe it is really found right in the middle of an ordinary life. Maybe the secret to extraordinary is not in pursuing a bigger paycheck, but in pursuing deeper relationships.

Lately I have been watching the people in my life a little closer. I've been thinking about the people that I greatly admire. Most of these people that I would describe as great people are actually very ordinary. They work a nondescript job that pays the bills more months than not. They have families with drama and issues. They slip and fall down along the way, and their names will probably never grace the pages of a history book.

It makes me think that maybe I should focus a little harder on being content with my life and rather than waiting for the "big moment" in life, I should focus on looking for ways to love the people I am with right now. It is time to stop waiting for what's next and time to start living the right now.

Coming Home

Three years. Three long years of a house on the market. Three years of riding my kids and family to maintain perfection. Three years of commuting to work, staying in my classroom for long, late hours while we waited on the teens to finish their sports and other extracurricular activities. After 3 long years, the house finally sold. We moved two big Uhauls of junk, plus many assorted vans, trucks, and suburbans loaded to the brim. I am sure that has to be sin that I have so much junk!

God blessed us with an amazing home in Anna. Paying more than we had anticipated, when we went to finance the larger amount of money, the interest rates were at a historic low - so the payment is less each month. The floor plan is perfect for our family. The kitchen has many of the features Shawn wanted, the girls have walk-in closets, James gets a bedroom with a door AND a closet, and I get not one - but two - window seats.

While I expected to experience a relief of stress and a sense of rest when we moved, I was surprised by the overwhelming sense of coming home. I knew it would be a relief to be able to leave a pile of clean laundry on the couch, or a single dirty cup in the sink if the dishwasher happened to be full. But I did not fully realize the extent to which we have moved our lives to Anna in the last three years, so much so that finally living here provides a sense of belonging that I can only explain as "coming home". My children are already hanging out with friends, we are entertaining in our home, and enjoying shopping at the local grocery store.

I am looking forward to what feels like a new era in our ministry at The Crossroads. A great moment where God can use our home to further the ministry of The Crossroads. A moment in time where we can live among our people and see God at work in our city. Change is in the wind. I see big things ahead for The Crossroads. Get ready for the ride!

Anna here we come!

3 years ago, we began trying to sell our home in Sherman, Texas in order to move to Anna where we were going to plant a church. This week, we finally had an offer on our home. I am a nervous wreck about the 14 day option period where the buyers get an inspection and have the chance to back out. The great news is that they plan to pay cash in full, so we don't have to worry about their financing falling through. In faith, we have started packing in preparation to move to Anna.

Today Shawn and I picked out a house we liked in the Westfield neighborhood. It was ideal for our family, even to one of the kid's bedrooms having a very large closet for my little girls who share a room. We looked at several homes, but this was really the only one close to our price range that had the space we need to host journey groups and generally use our home for ministry. We submitted an offer today and are waiting to hear back from the seller. Our financing has been approved and so now we simply wait.

I cannot begin to say how excited I am about being close to work. I can't even fathom going home between work and James's football games. Feeding my kids supper in our own kitchen instead of sandwiches in my classroom on game night will be great! Having the opportunity to host a journey group in our home makes me giddy excited. Shawn and I are already discussing doing an intensive care marriage group in the fall. We are trying to decide whether to call it Firey Friday Nights or Smokin hot Saturdays. I love the idea of being able to finally have friends over for dinner, and being able to open my home up to my kids' friends! I am also anxious to be able to invite the other area ministers and wives into my home for coffee and prayer for our city.

But whether this all goes through this time or not, I have been greatly blessed in the last 24 hours just by the response from our people. Typically in a church, the honeymoon period lasts 18 months -2 years. After that, the congregation may still love you, but the excitement has dimmed. Instead, our people are more excited now than they were three years ago. Their overwhelming desire to have us in their neighborhoods has touched my heart. I am blessed that God placed us into a situation where we are greatly loved. While I am nervous and apprehensive about the sale of our home, and buying another, I am grateful today that we are blessed to serve in an awesome community with amazing people!

The Great Battle

Fear

blanket of darkness

engulfing

swallowing

smothering.

Hope

glimmering light

lifting

embracing

strengthening.

Fear

Loudly in my head

questioning

doubting

disbelieving.

Hope

Quietly whispering

believing

trusting

waiting.

An Unsold House

Our house has been on the market for nearly three years. We have remodeled and dropped the price repeatedly. My kids have had their stuff in boxes in the attic for so long we no longer remember what we even own. In spite of our best efforts, we are still in this same house. We have cycled through many seasons of discouragement and disappointment. Recently I have remembered 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, "Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus."

Thankful, in all things. Well, hmmm....that's not always my strong point. Why could I be thankful that my house hasn't sold and we continue to live in Anna, but sleep in Sherman? Well, let's dig a little deeper -

1. 3 years of commuting helps me to understand clearly the issues our congregation of commuters is dealing with. The lack of time with the family, the strain on the marriage, the rush to get homework finished, the exhaustion that engulfs you. Living through this helps me to understand the pressure that our people are under and offer them understanding and love.

2. I have spent many hours trapped in the car with my children. These hours are usually spent laughing and talking. I would say that because of commuting my children are forced to spend a greater amount of time communicating with me, which has been critical in these early teen years.

3. Our people are learning to practice hospitality. This summer while we were displaced between Sunday morning and Sunday night services different families hosted us in their homes for lunch and let us hang out. Even now various families are making arrangements in their homes so that in the fall we can have a place to sleep after late night football games, or when we have a late counseling session, or if we need a place to hang out in the afternoon while the kids are at practices. As a result, we are getting to know and love these families on a whole new level. I am certain that God is going to pour out blessings on them. After all, hospitality is one of his primary gifts (I go to prepare a place for you....).

There are other positive things I can say about still living in our house - things like the band has a place to practice, we have room to entertain large crowds, we have room to have a long term guest, and a great place to go running.

I am desperate for my house to sell so that I can live locally in Anna. Commuting is tough, and I definitely dread it this fall. However, I want to focus on the good things that have come from this experience and be patient as I wait on God's timing for the sale.

Beautiful Worship

I am finally home after a week in Kansas City at the National Worship Leader Conference. At the last minute, we had an extra ticket that we couldn't get refunded that was going to be wasted, so my thirteen year old daughter agreed to attend with me. She primarily went out of concern for my safety. I have complex migraines, so she was worried that I might have problems while traveling alone.

Even though she attended out of concern, God simply poured out his blessing and presence in our lives last week. Some of you readers know the back story on Grace. This last fall she was struggling pretty hard with depression. Her mind was confused, her soul despaired, and she felt hopeless. When she reached the point that she felt life was unbearable, God showed her hope for her future.

The first night of worship at the concert, my daughter stood beside me in her well worn Mexico mission T-shirt while a bilingual group sang on stage. We worshiped through familiar songs in English, and then in Spanish. I watched her lift her hands in abandon as she sang along in English and broken Spanish. As I drank in the beautiful moment of worship, I was extremely grateful for second chances. I was glad that God had given my daughter hope, and that our week of worship began with a reminder of the country she loves. I guess I fully realized the greatness of God's work in her life this year. God took her confusion and replaced it with passion; he took her despair and replaced it with faith; and he took her hopelessness and replaced it with purpose.

As I looked back at what was probably one of the toughest years our family has faced, I see how God was faithful. He provided, he comforted, he healed, he redeemed, he forgave, he strengthened, he rescued, and he restored. I was reminded in that beautiful moment of worship of the stunning glory of our God, his character, and his love. He is good.